I once dated a business man and I should have known never to trust those because he said he wasn’t ready to commit yet he was more that ready to hit up the bars after work and meet his clients in miniskirts with dangly earrings for a couple of drinks. Yet I believed his lies even when he said that he couldn’t stay with me but he’d kiss me whenever the sun had gone down. And he didn’t have any tattoos on his body but I knew he would have gotten one before he would be caught in a relationship with anyone other than himself.
I once dated a drop out who called his year and a half in private school “a degree.” He half-assed his education the way he tried to half-assed a fake relationship out of us because the only things he wanted from me was what was under my clothes. He thought he was smart by kissing me at city lights and holding my hands when no one was around, and although relationships weren’t my forte I knew he wasn’t the man to be in one with.
I once dated an audio engineer who thought he was a rapper. Funny thing was, he told me he used to sometimes write and I should have known better than to trust someone who made vulgar words sound like music to one’s ear for all the words that came out of his mouth sounded sweet but tasted as salty as he. He also said he was too busy to be in a relationship but he was never too busy to hang out with his best friend, marijuana, and I guess he’s not too busy to be with her now.
I once dated an architect and he was so great at building, stories on top of stories, no pun intended there. And I thought that since he was older, he’d be more mature because at a certain age people should be done playing games but I was wrong. Because the older they are, the worse they get. This one was no different. He built his buildings during the day and built his lies throughout the night and he let me live in one of the stories he created for a moment and I lost track of time. I almost lost myself too.
I once dated a bunch of little boys and every time I think they’re men, they prove me wrong. I should have searched for people who wanted to be with me rather than look for people I thought I needed. Each time I think it’s different, it never is. But at least with each one, my choices progressively gets better. I started to love other people and give my heart to men who didn’t care, when I should have loved myself first.